Born 28 March 1993, a son to a loving Grandmother however both parents are alive, though neglected by both of them.
My achievements are weird but cool due to the fact that I use them to minister to young people, Three suicidal attempts, a former history of a sex addiction concocted with a daily dose of porn… God graced me to a point where I saw His hand in my life, I would hang myself the ropes would break, drank paraffin in the morning but in the evening I threw it out, pour as it is, without mixing it with anything… The hand of God…
In my early youth “junior Youth” as we would put it, I got introduced to porn, and I never slept with a girl, always saw it a way to keep myself pure, didn’t want to sleep with anyone however I was in the dark, the thought of me not being physical with anyone except “Myself” it was a self righteous act to me, growing up in the church and no one ever preached about porn and no one ever taught about lust so I saw myself much more righteous than anyone… I mean “I am a virgin” that’s what I would say “I don’t date” I was self righteous, religious and blind.
I started dating, and from the on set I started fornicating, and the problem was that I was dating older girls than more two years and above… The problem was association, I always had “friends” that are older than me, so the problem started with the desire to fit in with the crowd, I started seeing myself as part of them, even if they are older than me, I did what they did, would go to pubs with them while I was underage due to the fact that I saw myself as part of them and I became like them, dated and slept around like them, I did what they did and I wont blame it on the fact that I never had a male figure in my life, but my problem is that the friends that I had were from “Church” my fellow youth! And the problem that I have right now it’s with church…
My first pornographic tape that I watched was from my cousin, and he was born again, going to the same church as I was in, my first puff of weed, the first kiss that I had, the first sip of beer I was introduced by my fellow church members, my youth, my fellow “worship team” members…. Story for another day.
Now I grew up in the church however I was a “two fold son of hell” as Paul Washer would put it, I would sleep around watch porn and sleep with myself and the next Sunday I would be in front of the congregation an lead worship, lift up my hands and pray in an unknown tongue like I was lead by the Spirit of God, I thought I was born again due to the lies that our Modern Christianity told us, that if you prayed a prayer on time in your life you are born again and going to heaven however you’ll never find that in scripture, you’ll never find anything about a “so called” sinners prayer and anything that talks about you going to church weekly equivalents with acceptance in the sight of God.
Lived almost fifteen years if not more of my life believing that lie, that I was born again due to a sinners prayer, and I would get offended when some tries to lead me in one cause I already took that flu shot, already have a hell vaccine in my blood…
The church that I grew up in, got torn apart, someone took his part of the congregation and ran with them and the other did the same, which left no one but only less than ten people and I was part of those, I started to sit every Sunday and sleep half of the morning, until on brother who knew me, started to invite me to church, I started attending the church, however I was playing church in a well disciplined church, a church that taught the unadulterated Word of God, and to me that was some weird thing, I did not like it, however I would come to church, they would teach to a point where I felt like not coming the following week, but God has His ways.
I stopped coming for a months, till one day I was tired of the sin and I really wanted God, I was praying daily my usual prayers before I slept “Father in the Mighty name of Jesus please forgive me for my sins…” there it got me, I got hooked “…my sins…” I am a sinner, however I say that I am born again, I haunt after girls, I fornicate and masturbate all in one day, I watch porn and desire all the filth that the world desire, I am a sinner yet a praying sinner and a bible reading sinner, then a scripture came JAMES3:11 “Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?”
There it hit me, there it got me, the eyes of my understanding got enlighted, I saw differently, I started seek the face of God, regeneration occurred without someone preaching to me, a seed was sawn and that was the season right there for it to come out from the ground within me, and thus I got born again that day, not when I was at Sunday school reciting a “sinners prayer” not again when I was fourteen when Pastor So and So came after my Grand Mom called him to come over after my suicide attempt, not then, but on my bed side bowing on my knees I experienced an encounter with God…
#Selah @ImaFreak4Jesus #IamGrace
Brother Mosa Mahlaule 